David Simmonds

I have a long, sordid, unrequited history with tequila. So I like to think I know something about this liquor that I’m convinced has more in common with the hallucinogenic peyote plant (a distant cousin) than it does to any alcoholic beverage. You know what I mean. You’ve seen, or experienced yourself, how after imbibing a few ounces, the person (you?) becomes someone completely unrecognizable. I’m not talking about the usual drunken signs of marble-mouthed-slurring, over-emotional diatribes that no one listens to, or comical bar stool misses. No, tequila takes the consumer to a far different state, and that, I suspect, has much to do with its enduring popularity. (Hey Cortez, nice to meet you…can I offer you a drink?)

In the last twenty years or so tequila has become for many a much-desired sipping pleasure, more like a good, expensive Cognac. A record setting $225,000 was paid for a bottle of Pasion Tequila in a Platinum manufactured bottle by Tequila Ley. At tequila bars where you and I drink it’s not uncommon to pay $20.00 for a shot of premium aged stuff. I haven’t personally bought into this marketing coup, and on the rare occasion that I do order a shooter these days, I tell the barkeep to pour me the cheapest swill behind the bar. It’s always the same. They say “Huh? You Sure?” I say yeah and slam it down…the way Moctezuma intended.

Now I find out that tequila has even more value than that of mind-altering personality changer. Some Mexican scientists have discovered you can turn the white tequila (the cheap stuff) into diamonds! It has something to do with the ratio of oxygen, hydrogen and carbon. You can read about the details here http://www.physorg.com/news145255770.html.